First off women are great. Being a woman and having trained them, they are courageous and determined. But during my time training at the gym or with friends, family and in general life, women are still finding their way in fitness. Of course a lot has changed for the better since I started my fitness journey in the gym. And it is progress. But it is not yet the status quo.
Some general concerns specific to women & fitness that I have understood…
- Body Image: We women tend to have certain versions or ideals of how our body should look. This is based mainly on beauty standards in society, trends (who sets these anyway), media, popular culture, celebrities, peer pressure, blah blah blah… All have nothing to do with anything meaningful. Our bodies are not meant to look a certain way. We all are not meant to have thin thighs, washboard abs, size zero, hour glass figure or whatever else. The purpose of our body is to sustain us in our daily lives and profession and athletic pursuits if any. Striving for a certain look can not only be unhealthy, you can also miss appreciating your natural potential. We have body structures that are based on genetics. And we need to celebrate the differences than compare. The beauty lies in the variety. We all don’t need to look the same. Our body is a marvel of nature… evolved through time (millions of years)… giving you the best possible chance to survive and thrive. Celebrate it.
Striving for good body composition is good (to have less fat and more lean mass) but don’t try to look a certain way. (Again fat distribution is genetic, not a flaw) You will be happier when you embrace all of you.
- Scared to Lift Weights: Somewhere there has been a false notion that lifting weights makes you muscular and bulky. As women we don’t have the hormones (testosterone) to become muscular the instant we start lifting weights. And even for men it’s not that easy to gain muscle. It’s a lot of hard work and a lot eating right. Women: We lift weights to get stronger and improve our metabolism. If losing fat is the goal, then the right nutrition plan will help in achieving it. You may also gain a little muscle or retain your muscle which is a good thing. Because muscle is what makes us strong and helps us move and keep the fat off. But you will never get to the stage where you look like a competitive body builder or power lifter… That is just not possible at all. (Unless that is your goal and you work for it). Putting on that much muscle is very very very hard work. You need to train hard (4-5 days/week, 2+hours in the gym+ years of doing this). 2-3 days a week with 1 hour resistance training does not compare. Not to mention regular meal plans.
- Afraid of Squats & Push Ups: Everyone can squat & do a push up if we train for it. Even with previous injuries or health issues. Unless your doctor has specifically asked you to avoid them. There is a version of all major movement patterns: Squat, Deadlift, Push, Pull, Twist, Single Leg & core exercises that can be modified to suit you. And these are the functional movement patterns that we use in our daily lives. So learning these skills is a necessity.
- Doubt their abilities: As women we tend to think that we are not made to be physically strong or powerful. This is an unfair comparison we make with men. Yes men are built with more muscle mass and it may be easier for them to be physically fit. But women too are no less. We can train our bodies to do just about everything. Most women who do it are not born with a natural athletic ability. They learnt and trained for everything step by step.
- Nutrition: Afraid of eating. Under Eating. Not eating the right food. Again this goes to the huge thing of weight loss. Eating is for your sustenance. To give you energy and nutrients to maintain a healthy body to carry on your activities. Food is not something that makes you gain or lose weight. It’s the food choices we make, eating habits, lifestyle, stress, portions, lack of physical activity that tend to keep us unhealthy.
- Worried about weight: Almost every woman I know (including me) wants to exercise to lose weight. I wanted to for health reasons. But many of us are conditioned by society to give a lot of importance to our weight. Why? Why is weight important? Health is important. Yes. Body Composition is important. Having a healthy ratio of fat: lean mass (less fat, more lean mass) is good for the body. Helps us move better, be more active, keeps us healthy. But weight does not measure fat. It is everything including your bone, muscle, tissue, organs. If you are obsessed with weight or think that you need to be in some weight range and try to lose by dieting & cardio, you could be losing bone density, muscle mass, water content along with fat. And this whole obsession with women and weight loss has created a whole industry that promotes unhealthy crash diets and overreaching exercise plans. Focus on getting stronger, improving your nutrition and lifestyle. The fat loss will happen by itself. A healthy body is the result of a healthy lifestyle. Stop with the obsession about your weight. Start obsessing about your lifestyle.
- Too busy taking care of others, no time for themselves: Yes we all think it’s our sole responsibility to take care of our family. Load sharing, getting help, delegating is your right. You have a right and necessity to take care of yourself. If you are your best self, only then can you be there for others.
In the end, all of these issues are a result of conditioning in society, patriarchy, gender bias, and all. Its very deep seated and will take time to change. I just want to say to all women: its okay to prioritize yourself, it’s okay to get help, and stop comparing yourself to others, stop listening to naysayers or unsolicited advice on your looks or body… Stop taking others ideals as your own. Be your own person. Forge your own path. Do your own thing. 💪